7 Things People Get Wrong about Nevada Birth Fathers

There are many different misconceptions about birth mothers who place their baby for adoption, but there isn’t enough discussion about the misconceptions surrounding birth fathers. Birth fathers are just as much birth parents as birth mothers, and yet, they are subjected to many negative stereotypes. This needs to change because their adoption journeys and emotional well-being matter and need to be taken seriously. At Adoption Choices of Nevada, we are committed to debunking harmful myths about birth fathers. We put together this list of things people get wrong about birth fathers in Nevada to help chip away at some of the stigmas birth fathers face.

1. Birth Fathers Don’t Care about the Birth Mother and Child

In many cases, birth fathers are emotionally invested in and supportive of the well-being of both the birth mother and child. While it’s true that some birth mothers face an unsupportive, absent, or even abusive partner, many birth fathers want the best outcomes for everyone and support the mother’s choice to pursue adoption. A birth father may not have the financial means to support a family, or he may simply not be ready to be a parent, much like the birth mother. That does not mean he is uncaring or unwilling to do his part to secure his child’s future.

2. Birth Fathers Give Up the Baby for Adoption out of Abandonment

An accusation that birth fathers can face is that they abandon the child by pursuing adoption with the birth mothers. People may wrongfully assume that they are shirking their responsibilities to step up and take on parenthood. Birth fathers may feel a stigma that they are failing as a man if they are not able to support the birth mother and child. However, it’s important to remember that adoption is not a cop-out. It’s a way for both birth parents to get back on their feet while giving the child an opportunity to grow up in an environment that can support his or her needs if the birth parents feel that they can’t do that themselves. By pursuing adoption, birth fathers and mothers are giving, not giving up.

3. Birth Fathers Have No Rights during or after the Birth Mother’s Pregnancy

Another common misconception about birth fathers is that they have no parental rights, and they have no say in the adoption process. Under most circumstances, birth fathers in Nevada must consent to relinquish their parental rights to the adoptive family. They have the right to relinquish their parental rights before the child is born. If a birth father disagrees with the birth mother’s decision to place the baby for adoption, her rights do not automatically trump his rights, and he may be able to obtain custody of the child.

4. Birth Fathers Play No Role in Putting Up the Baby for Adoption

If the birth father is on board with the birth mother’s decision to place the baby for adoption, his involvement in the adoption process does not necessarily end with simply giving his consent. He and the birth mother can work as a team to find an adoptive family, choose the type of adoption to pursue, and plan out the hospital stay.  They give each other support and comfort so they can get through the adoption process together.

5. Birth Fathers aren’t Involved after Placing the Baby for Adoption

When people think of adopted children reuniting with a birth parent, the common image is that it’s the birth mother who reunites with them. However, if the birth parents pursue an open or semi-open adoption, the birth father can also see his birth child and be just as involved in his or her life as the birth mother. For many birth fathers, having some kind of relationship with their child can bring them a sense of closure and peace of mind that they made the right decision along with the birth mother.

6. Birth Fathers Don’t Miss the Child after Placement

In conjunction with several of the other misconceptions about birth fathers, many come to the conclusion that birth fathers don’t miss the child after adoption, and that they are relieved to not be bothered with taking care of a child they don’t want. This couldn’t be further than the truth for the countless birth fathers who bond with the baby. Birth fathers who choose adoption do so because they believe it will lead to the best outcomes for the child. Their hope is that the child will not have to struggle in ways their parents might struggle, and adoption holds the best chance for a bright future.

7. Birth Fathers Don’t Need Emotional Support from Adoption Agencies in Nevada

Since there is an expectation for men to not be vulnerable and to simply “man-up” any time they encounter hardship, there is an assumption that men who place their children for adoption don’t need emotional support. The reality is that many birth fathers grieve when another family raises their child. They wish that they were in a position to support their child, but they know that their child will have more opportunities to thrive with an adoptive family. This demonstrates just how selfless birth fathers are when they choose adoption.

In order to heal and move on with their lives, birth fathers can benefit from counseling services to process and understand their feelings. In fact, Adoption Choices of Nevada offers both birth fathers and birth mothers with emotional support services free of charge. They can also find some resolution to their emotional struggles by relying on a personal support network consisting of friends, family, and even other birth fathers.

How Can Birth Fathers Find Help and Acceptance?

Despite the many things that people get wrong about birth fathers in Nevada, birth fathers are deserving of understanding and support. Birth fathers need to know that they can find compassion and guidance at Adoption Choices of Nevada during every step of the adoption process. If you are a birth father in Nevada, we are eager to work with you and help you and the birth mother have a successful adoption journey.

Adoption Choices of Nevada has been providing adoption and surrogacy services across Nevada since 2012. You can also call us to speak to someone now. Contact Us 24/7: 855-940-4673 (Toll-Free) | 702-474-4673 (Las Vegas) | 775-825-4673 (Reno) | 775-738-4673 (Elko) | 775-884-4673 (Carson City).

Meet the Author: Mary DeStefano is an Ohio native currently living in northern Virginia and works in the litigation consulting industry where she has experience in antitrust, product liability, and mass torts matters. She holds a B.A. in Economics (‘15) and an M.A. in Applied Economics (‘16) from the University of Cincinnati. 

Mary is passionate about empowering and supporting those involved in the adoption and surrogacy processes. She finds great meaning in wielding the written word to develop impactful narratives and to help people stay informed. In her spare time, Mary can be found beachcombing and going on other adventures with her dog along the shores of the Chesapeake Bay. She also has an affinity for antiquing and loves a good 80’s movie marathon.