10 Fears Birth Mothers Have About Open Adoption
By Isabelle Sitchon
When you decide to start your adoption journey in an open adoption, you’ll probably have several questions. These questions may turn into fears, which is often normal for many birth mothers. If you’re feeling afraid of what’s to come next in an open adoption, rest assured that you’re not alone. At Adoption Choices of Nevada, we understand that such a time can be difficult. Adoption is not an easy choice, let alone the journey that comes with it. That’s why we’re here to give you some peace of mind through this blog. We hope that these answers down below will help you combat the fears you have about open adoption.
1. Is this the wrong choice?
Choosing an open adoption is not a wrong choice. In fact, no type of adoption should be considered a wrong choice. In any type of adoption in Nevada, you have the power to come to your own decisions. When you start to make decisions in your adoption journey, we want you to be informed and confident about the choices you make. With our adoption agencies, your adoption counselor can help answer any question you have. We will be there to listen to any concerns or doubts you’re worried about.
2. Will my child, hate me in the future?
It may feel tempting to believe that your child will eventually grow to resent you for placing them in adoption. However, this is difficult to predict, considering that this can be years in the future. Open adoption will allow you to keep in touch with your child if you and the adoptive parents agree. They’ll grow up in a loving home with loving parents who know the stakes of your choice for adoption. If you are worried about this happening, communicate your fears to the adoptive family and your adoption caseworker. Additionally, if you need emotional support, your caseworker will be there to listen to your fears and worries.
3. Am I a bad mother for choosing open adoption?
When you’re thinking, “I want to put my baby up for adoption,” this does not make you a bad mother. Deciding on choosing open adoption may not be easy, but you have perfectly valid reasons as to why you decided on this. You may not feel ready to be a parent yet, or be in the best environment to raise your child. However, by deciding on adoption, you are already taking big, brave steps for your child. By choosing open adoption, your child will be given a chance to live a happy life that you may have felt wasn’t possible. The choice to give them this opportunity is an incredibly thoughtful decision and shows that you only want the best for your child. Choosing an open adoption doesn’t make you a bad mother–you’re a considerate mother who cares deeply for your child’s well-being.
4. I’m afraid the adoptive family will not take care of my child.
While this may definitely be something to be afraid of, you won’t need to worry. Our adoptive families are carefully screened to ensure they are appropriate for raising your child. They will go through a background check, home study, and other additional measures. It’s important to keep in mind that adoptive families are eagerly ready to love your child as their own. They will provide a safe environment and raise them with the utmost care.
5. Will my child is confused in the future because I chose to give them up for adoption?
It’s inevitable for your child to have questions about you while growing up, but the adoptive parents can explain your situation to them. Many adoptive families are choosing to have these important conversations about their adoption with their child. In an open adoption, communicating honestly with the adoptive family can help them plan out this conversation. What’s most important is that your child knows that they are loved in each and every way by yourself and their adoptive family.
6. What if I can’t find an adoptive family for my baby?
While this is important to worry about, we want you to know that there is always a family waiting to love your child. With our adoption agencies in Nevada, your adoption caseworker can help you look through family profiles. We have many parents who are earnestly waiting to welcome a child into their family. We encourage you to let your caseworker know if you have any specific concerns or preferences. Our adoption specialists will guide you in finding the best family suitable for your child.
7. Will I have to co-parent my child with the adoptive parents?
It’s important to know that co-parenting is not the same as open adoption in Nevada. Co-parenting involves the sharing of parental responsibilities with another party. In an open adoption, this is not the case. When your baby is adopted, the parental rights transfer over to the adoptive parents. While you can still keep in touch with your child, you are not responsible for medical or legal decisions.
8. What should I do if people judge me because I chose open adoption?
The decision to choose an open adoption takes a lot of courage. However, that kind of courage may not be known by many people. What is not seen by many is a birth mother’s bravery, selflessness, and loving heart. While there may be family or friends of yours who may judge you for choosing open adoption, there are those who will support you. They see the opportunity you give to your child and their adoptive family. That choice alone shows your strength and compassion in your walk with adoption.
9. I won’t be able to be close to or connected with my child in the future.
What differentiates an open and closed adoption is the level of contact you can have with your child after the adoption. In the future, there is a possibility for you to keep in touch with your baby. It depends on what you and the adoptive parents agree on. Whether it’s through letters, phone calls, or even in-person visits–you do have a chance to have a connection with your child in an open adoption.
10. I’m not sure that I can handle going through the adoption process.
The path ahead in the adoption process can be a rocky, unpredictable trail. At our adoption agencies, we have trained counselors who can help you navigate the road ahead. We are on your side, and if there is anything you’re feeling uneasy about–we can guide you. From deciding on an adoption plan to getting emotional support after an adoption, our specialists will be there for you. In addition to your counselor, your friends and family are also here to support you as well. The adoption process is never a journey you have to face alone.
Choosing Adoption Choices of Nevada to help combat adoption fears
Placing your baby for adoption is one of the bravest and most selfless actions a birth mother can take. If you are seeking more information about options for your baby, such as adoption in Las Vegas, Adoption Choices of Nevada has been providing adoption and surrogacy services across Nevada since 2012. You can call us to speak to someone now by contacting us 24/7 at 855-940-4673 (Toll-Free) | 702-474-4673 (Las Vegas) | 775-825-4673 (Reno) | 775-884-4673 (Carson City).