Adoption in Reno, BM Blog

By Adoption Choices of Nevada

My Nevada Adoption Wasn’t What I Expected— What Now?

By Erin McKenna 

If you’ve just given a baby up for adoption in Nevada and it wasn’t what you expected, you’re not alone. Society places a lot of pressure and expectations on birth parents who have chosen the adoption process. You may feel like you should be feeling grief, regret, or guilt about your decision. Whether those expectations match your reality or not, navigating your emotions after adoption can be challenging. There is no “wrong” way to experience adoption—and if you don’t feel bad, there’s nothing “wrong” with you. Adoption Choices of Nevada is here for you as you process your feelings, whether they’re negative or not. No matter how you feel, we are here to provide a judgment-free environment so you can thrive post-adoption.

The Perception of Giving a Baby Up For Adoption 

Giving a baby up for adoption is often associated with strong negative emotions. There are plenty of resources available for birth parents who experience grief, depression, guilt, or regret before or after pregnancy. Even though these are the “expected” responses, they are far from the only valid ones. And even though these are expected responses, there is, unfortunately, still a great deal of stigma surrounding birth parents who experience them. If you are feeling this way, there is absolutely nothing wrong with you. Don’t be afraid to use resources from adoption agencies in your area. Remember: whatever you’re going through after placing your baby for adoption, you’re not alone.

The Reality of Choosing Adoption

For many birth parents, the expectations placed on them don’t match the reality of their experience. This feeling can be confusing—is something wrong with me because I don’t feel sad after the adoption process? First, there is absolutely no wrong way to feel after placing a baby for adoption. Just because your feelings don’t match what other people think you should be feeling, it doesn’t mean they’re wrong. Second, you are not alone in these feelings. Plenty of other people feel exactly the same way you do. Many birth parents report feeling relief, joy, or empowerment after the adoption process. You just made a safe, responsible choice for your future. It’s okay if you don’t regret it! Every emotional journey is unique, and that’s okay. 

Resources For Birth Parents After Choosing Adoption In Nevada

Regardless of how you feel after choosing adoption in Nevada, there are resources available for you. Meeting with a support group of other birth parents in your position can be massively beneficial. Hearing a wide variety of perspectives demonstrates how different the adoption process is from person to person. Meeting with people who know exactly how you feel can be extremely validating. Adoption Choices of Nevada has support groups that meet on a regular basis. You can attend these meetings for as long or as short as you would like. Give it a try once or stick with it for years—the only timeline you’re on is your own.

Meeting with an adoption expert at our adoption centers can also be beneficial. Our licensed professionals work with Nevada birth parents every day and know exactly what you’re going through. They can help you make an adoption plan that sets you and your child up for success. Our experts will never shame or judge you for your choice and will never pressure you into any decisions. 

If your feelings after choosing adoption begin to interfere with your daily life, seeking therapy is always recommended. There is nothing wrong with seeking professional help at any stage of the adoption process. Structured support is not the only kind out there, however. Don’t forget to rely on your community at this time. Your family, by blood or by choice, is a wonderful resource. The people who love you most in this world are here for you no matter what and are a resource too many ignore.

Be Empowered In Your Adoption Journey

Wherever you’re on your adoption journey, Adoption Choices of Nevada is here for you. If you don’t know who to call when you’re pregnant (and don’t want the baby), we’re here for you. Rely on us for as long as you need—our relationship doesn’t end once your unplanned pregnancy is over. Speak to licensed adoption experts in your area and start your adoption plan today. Know that wherever you’re on your adoption journey, you’re not alone. We’re here to support and empower you, no matter what. You’re not alone, and there are resources available to you. Contact us today and find out why so many Nevada birth parents trust us with their adoption.