The Top Questions to Ask LGBT Adoptive Parents

While going through the process of selecting adoptive parents for your baby, it is normal to feel overwhelmed with all of your options. One of the best ways to narrow down your search, and make sure you have only the best candidates to choose from, is for you to know the right questions to ask these prospective adoptive families. As a birth mother, your only concern is doing what is best for your baby, and that means reviewing all different types of family structures in order to figure out which is the best fit for your child.

LGBT adoptive parents are a wonderful possibility for you to consider throughout this process. That said, you may be wondering what the best way to get to know same sex adoptive parents is. Luckily, we are here to help! At Adoption Choices of Nevada, we want you to be as prepared as possible when meeting waiting families for your baby.

To begin the process, we have compiled a list of the top questions to ask LGBT adoptive parentsso that when the day comes you can be ready to interview them!

How did You Know You Wanted to Become Parents?

Let’s start with the basics. This is a pretty standard question to ask any prospective adoptive family while going through the interview process. This question is a good place to start, because the answer will provide you with insight into what the LGBT couple hopes to get out of becoming adoptive parents. Every adoptive family has their own reasons for choosing to adopt, so asking this question can help you to get a better idea of their “why.”

Plus, it is always a good idea to start with a simple but telling question like this to break the ice and ease the awkwardness out of your visit.

What are Your Favorite Qualities in Each Other?

The answer to this question will help you to paint a picture of the kind of adoptive parents the interviewees will become. Not only will this question expose admirable characteristics that the couple sees in each other, it will also show you what kind of traits can be passed down to your child throughout their life. For example, finding out that the LGBT adoptive parents describe each other as empathetic, compassionate or nurturing can help you to see the kind of person your baby will grow up to be. This can offer you a certain level of comfort in your decision.

Hearing the qualities that the couple or individual admires in one another will also give you an inside look at the dynamics of their relationship. The traits we admire in others oftentimes are the ones we lack in ourselves, so seeing what each half of the couple appreciates about the other will show you how they complement each other to make for the best parenting strategy possible.

Why is Your Home a Good Place to Raise a Child?

This is definitely one of the most important questions to ask LGBT adoptive parentsin an interview. You already know that the home environment will vary depending on the type of adoptive family, but this question will help you to dive deeper.

In same sex households, there is the absence of a gender binary and, thus, the absence of household tasks based on gender roles. Asking this question will give you an inside peek at the inner workings of the household, and give you all of the information you need to make an informed decision. It will help you to paint a picture of the kind of upbringing your child will experience leading you to decide if this couple or individual is the right fit for you!

How will You Teach Your Child to Be a Good Person?

This question can provide you with some insight into the parenting style of the adoptive parents that you are interviewing. Because LGBT couples have a unique experience, it is likely that they will have different methods of parenting and teaching valuable lessons when compared to another type of adoptive family. These methods of teaching and nurturing your baby will ultimately shape them into the person they were meant to be; and so, the answer to this question can be a make or break when it comes time for your ultimate decision.

As a birth mother, this answer is an important one because it will allow you to go further in the interview process. This will not only help you to determine the kind of person your baby will grow up to be in this household, but also how they will become that person. Oftentimes, the “how” is what makes all of the difference.

Questions to Ask LGBT Adoptive Parents 

We know that interviewing prospective adoptive families can be a scary process. We understand that as a birth mother, it is natural for you to feel pressure to make the best decision for your child. It is important to ask thorough questions to learn as much as you can about the couple or individual who will raise your child.

The most essential piece of advice we can give you is to always go with your gut. You are the one in charge during these interviews. You know what kind of life you hope for your baby to have. Let the love you feel for your child guide you and rest will all fall into place!  

Adoption Choices of Nevada in has been providing adoption and surrogacy services across Nevada since 2012. For information specific to Las Vegas, please visit our sister site Adoption and Surrogacy Choices of Las Vegas. For information specific to Reno, please visit our sister site Adoption and Surrogacy Choices of Reno. You can also call us to speak to someone now. Contact Us 24/7: CALL OR TEXT 702-474-4673

Meet the Author: Katie Deeis a resident of Long Island, New York and member of the 2020 graduating class of State University of New York (SUNY) at Oneonta. She completed her bachelor’s degree in English, dedicating a year to family studies.

Katie has hands-on classroom experience in the field of writing, editing and child and family studies. Her experience, in both the writing field and that of family studies, gives her a unique perspective in her pieces centered around the field of adoption.