Adoption in Reno, BM Blog

By Adoption Choices of Nevada

Understanding and Preparing for Labor, Delivery, and the Finalization of Your Child’s Adoption

By Isabelle Bryan

As a birth mother, much of the adoption process can be a stressful and emotionally overwhelming experience. There are a variety of decisions that need to be made—without the assurance that they will be the right ones. There are emotions to work through during and after your child adoption. And there is the uncertainty that comes with the process of labor and delivery. 

Childbirth is not an exact science, and your experiences may be very different from that of other birth mothers. But with knowledge and a birth plan, it is something you can do your best to take control of. And Adoption Choices of Nevada can help with this. Our adoption agencies and specialists are here to give you whatever assistance you need to make decisions and prepare yourself. It is our goal to inform, guide, support, and advocate for you over the course of both adoption and delivery. 

Understanding the Stages of Labor as a Birth Mother Planning a Child Adoption

Labor and delivery are some of the last steps of every adoption process. As such, it is important for birth mothers to understand—and be able to prepare—for them as much as possible. And one of the first things to understand is that childbirth takes place in three stages. These are:

  • The first stage is the process of early and active labor, which can last for a number of hours. For some birth mothers, this stage may even take a couple of days. It will likely be longer for first-time mothers than those who have given birth before, however. During early labor, contractions begin and, over time, get closer together as the cervix dilates to about 6 centimeters. You will likely see some vaginal discharge, which may be clear, pink, or slightly bloody. As active labor begins, your water may break, if it has not already. Additionally, contractions will get closer together as your cervix continues to dilate. 
  • The second stage of labor begins when your cervix has dilated to the full 10 centimeters. This is when you will begin to push. It is important to listen to your doctor during this stage, as they may coach you through the process. Additionally, they may ask you to slow down or stop pushing entirely to prevent tearing. At the end of this stage, your baby will be delivered and the umbilical cord will be cut. If it becomes necessary, this may happen via C-section.
  • During the third stage of labor, the placenta is delivered. This usually happens within 30 minutes of giving birth, and is the shortest stage of labor. You will experience relatively mild contractions and be asked to push gently. Following this, your uterus will continue contracting as it returns to its normal size.

Creating a Birth Plan During Your Adoption Process

Your birth plan is a guide to your preferences during and after your child’s delivery. It can be made at the same time as the adoption plan or later in your Nevada adoption process. When making your birth plan, you can include as much or as little detail as you want. But it is important to remember that the more you add, the more your adoption specialist and doctors know. And the more they know, the better they can advocate for you. 

Here are some things to consider when making your birth plan:

  • Who you want to have with you during delivery. This may be friends, family, the birth father, or even the adoptive parents. However, make sure whoever is in the room is someone you want to have with you. Not someone you are trying to please.
  • The hospital you want to give birth in
  • Whether you would prefer a vaginal delivery or a C-section
  • Preferences regarding natural pain management, including staying active, meditation, aromatherapy, and breathing exercises
  • Preferences regarding medical pain management, such as an epidural
  • Preferences regarding intervention during the birth, such as induced labor or the use of forceps
  • Your wants regarding the delivery room. This may include comfort objects, the playing of favorite music, or maintaining a certain level of lighting.
  • Whether you want to hold your baby or breastfeed after giving birth
  • Who you want to have cut the umbilical cord

Remember, the birth plan should be a guide to your preferences. Not those of family, friends, or the adoptive parents. Your wants and needs are the only things to consider during this stage.

How Your Nevada Adoption May Affect You Emotionally and the Importance of Getting the Support You Need

The adoption process can be the source of a variety of emotions for birth mothers. Some may be positive, such as feelings of love, hope, and relief. Others may be more negative, including feelings of grief and loss, guilt, anger, denial, and depression. In the end, there is no one way—or wrong way—to feel. What is important is taking care of yourself and not letting your feelings overwhelm you. Experience them, understand them, and then let yourself begin to heal. 

One way to do this is by building a support system. Support is an incredibly important aspect of your Las Vegas adoption. It may take the form of a group of loved ones who are there for you when you need them. It might be a group of birth mothers who can listen and empathize. Or it could be professional assistance from one of our adoption agencies. The important thing is finding people to help take care of you. Trying to deal with everything on your own is a nearly surefire way to overwhelm yourself. 

At Adoption Choices of Nevada, we offer a variety of adoption services to help support and care for birth mothers. These include:

  • Professional counseling services during and post-adoption
  • Financial assistance with expenses including rent, utilities, food, and clothing for eligible birth mothers  
  • Access to prenatal care
  • Assistance creating an adoption and birth plan
  • Mediating communication between birth parents and adoptive families for those who choose a semi-open adoption
  • Unexpected pregnancy help for birth mothers experiencing an unplanned pregnancy

Preparing Yourself for Delivery and the Effects of Your Adoption

The process of labor and delivery can be stressful and full of uncertainty. But with the right birth plan and care team, you will have the support you need to get through it. Inform yourself, make the decisions that are right for you, and find a care team who listens to you. Do not compromise on your health and well-being. 

If this still sounds daunting, remember that our adoption agencies are here for you every step of the way. At Adoption Choices of Nevada, it is our goal to ensure that your adoption is as stress-free as possible. Our adoption specialists can help you make decisions, advocate for you, and provide a listening ear. All you have to do is ask.